October 2019
(Editors note: I wrote this column a few years ago but I think the message is important during the month of October when we bring awareness to this horrible disease and honor all the brave heroes that are afflicted with breast cancer and all cancers).

Hero (male) and heroine (female) in the dictionary is described as someone who, in the face of danger and adversity or from a position of weakness, displays courage and the will for self sacrifice—that is, heroism—for some greater good of all humanity.

Heroes come in all kinds of people. They come in our police officers, fire fighters, first responders, armed services men and women and anyone who takes an oath in their jobs to “honor and protect” the community it serves. Those kinds of heroes have the risk of walking into harms way every day they go to work or volunteer their time. But these men and women who put their lives at risk for you and I, do it because that is the honorable path they have chosen to make a difference in the world.
But some heroes don’t choose to be heroes, they become that way because of the road that fate has placed them on and courage and strength are skills that they have acquired while walking along it.
Along with the autumn breeze comes the colors of fall. The warm colors of browns, oranges and yellows, that give a welcome sign that fall is upon us. But this year as we step into the month of October there is another color that surrounds us, one for some reason I hadn’t noticed as much up until three years ago. The color of pink.
The color first caught my eye as I was watching the Giants game that year. Every player, every referee, every coach, was wearing something pink. Whether it was their shoes or helmets or whistles, every one of them had pink somewhere on them to remind the world that it was Breast Cancer Awareness month. Local stores, businesses and schools also strived to use the color pink to bring awareness to consumers and young students.
Maybe I notice it more now in the month of October because it makes me think of the friends I know who are or were battling this all too wide spread disease. I, along with most of you, have had friends who have battled this disease, who have lost to this disease and who are fighting this disease with all their strength today. I admire these women for their courage and strength and I know their battle has made them stronger and more grateful of every breath they take.

But today as I write this column on the first day of October the color pink is reminding me of a very special woman I met many years ago when our daughters were in kindergarten together. I wrote about her in this column last year but I feel it’s only fitting to tell you her story again because I think of her strength and courage often and she is always a gentle reminder to me why life is so precious and every breath we take is a true gift. Though we had never been the closest of friends ours had been a friendship that had grown through the years as together we had walked beside our children through the same school days in the same town in the same places.

This amazing woman had been fighting breast cancer for as long as I’ve known her. At first I was shocked to learn that she was sick. She was beautiful, upbeat and always had a smile on her face, not someone I pictured who had cancer. But I soon got to learn more about her when she contacted me to put a fundraiser in the paper about a walk her and her sisters were doing to raise money and awareness of breast cancer. I got to know her more through her efforts and was amazed at her strength, passion and determination to make a difference in the fight against breast cancer. I saw her at her highs and I saw her at some of her lows but I always saw her with her beautiful smile, fighting harder than anyone I ever met to beat a diagnosis that she didn’t have a choice to receive. Every time I ran into her, I was always humbled by her grace and courage, most of us don’t know that kind of courage nor do we ever hope to have to, but she had it and I admired her and looked up to the person she was. She wasn’t just fighting breast cancer for herself, she was fighting it for her daughter, for her sisters, for her friends and for all of us to make a difference in the world because she knew she had to.

My friend Bette Ann Pinkham lost her courageous battle to breast cancer on March 19, 2012 at the young age of 48 surrounded by her loving family. Today, her beautiful daughter Samantha  continues her mom’s fight to bring awareness and raise money to find a cure in the memory of her mom and her aunts through her family’s foundation called Pink SOC’s.

Yes, she was the true definition of a hero, as are all the other warriors who are fighting this disease, and my column this month is dedicated to them.
A famous athlete who was diagnosed with cancer a few years back once said;
“If children have the ability to ignore all odds and percentages, then maybe we can all learn from them. When you think about it, what other choice is there but to hope? We have two options, medically and emotionally: give up, or fight like hell.”
“Fight like hell!”